Injustice

Injustice.

It’s a word that’s been floating around in my mind for days.

Maybe weeks.

Maybe years.

I didn’t fully understand injustice in my own limited world until my baby was diagnosed with an unknown syndrome and died three years later. I didn’t fully understand the injustice parents of special needs children experience. I didn’t understand the injustice of a grieving parent. In so many ways, I wish I still didn’t understand, but I do.

It’s funny how I could feel such peace at the time and then go on to feel such injustice.

Such pain and heart break....such unfairness.

Injustice.

The injustice and hardness in my heart sometimes left me looking for someone or something to blame.

Most times the someone was me and sometimes the somethings were something I had chosen.

At times the ‘someones’ might be a doctor or some other person who might ‘just not understand.’.....it might have been a medication I took, something I ate, environmental toxins.

There were so many things physically ‘wrong’ with my baby there were plenty of ‘somethings’ I could blame. I remember watching lawyer commercials for drugs and environmental factors that claimed to cause certain health risks or birth defects and I thought....hmm maybe that caused Zeta’s problems. I even had a couple of lawyers contact me.

I remember a particularly trying time in the hospital (a time in which I still believe a lot of mistakes were made and covered up).....a time in which I wanted the people -who I felt failed- to pay...I wanted them to understand the pain their actions (and/or lack thereof) caused.

Injustice.

We’ve all felt it.

We’ve all known it.

There are more injustices in this world I’m passionate about.

The injustice our children face. The cruel dog-eat-dog world they face each day. The injustice that somehow my own boys might feel “less than” because they weren’t sports stars or aren’t going to pursue medicine or engineering as a career.....the injustice that at some point I’m just as guilty of being the one to make them feel less than. The injustice of all they have faced over time and the fact they have the most caring hearts and trust of God in a world that doesn’t value that as a priority.

The injustice of school children I’ve encountered. The fact that single parent homes are more common than two parent homes. The fact they were born into a cycle of poverty. The fact that They have not allowed God to penetrate the most hardened and broken pieces of their hearts. The fact they (more likely than not) don’t have the skills to break that cycle and turn to things like drugs and gangs. The fact that some of the toughest gang members could greet me with hugs and smiles and yes ma’am’s and no ma’am’s, not because I demanded (which technically, I guess I did), but because I respected them and they respected me.

The injustice of people just looking for somewhere to place blame. Just like farmers (less than 2% of the population) working to feed the entire world’s population and the entertainment industry throwing buzz words like GMO and glyphosate around without fully understanding.....and sometimes unfounded legislation and low, capped commodity prices continually making it more and more difficult to feed the people that think they’re trying to kill them.

The greatest injustice is that we’re a nation engaged in constant spiritual warfare and while we’re busy attacking EACH OTHER over all the injustices we feel, Satan is out there continuing to win people over. We worship money, we worship time, we worship strength and popularity. We worship the things that make us comfortable and give us the most gratification. Meanwhile, the injustices of the world continue, and we continue to feel the pain of it. Question is, what are we actually DOING to combat it? Are we praying, are we listening to each other, are we loving each other, are we trusting and following GOD? OR are we just complaining and attacking?