I have to say that I find it both comforting and
disconcerting that it often takes something negative going on for me to really
step back and realize all that I have to be thankful for….
Yes, even
after all that we’ve been through I still get caught up in the whole “why me”
cycle…..if you read my last blog you obviously noticed that………
Well, true
to His Word, once I got my little temper tantrum out, I’ve been given many
reminders about how precious life is and about how I really should get down on
my knees and thank God that I’ve got this crazy life!
It wasn’t long after my last post that Zeta became sick. She has been back on the ventilator full-time for nearly a week now (Up until then she has been off it during the day for some time and we had actually begun trying to wean her from it some at night too). The first few days back on were pretty rough and we were beginning to anticipate a hospital stay…….I also figured out pretty quickly that I was very thankful that she hasn’t been on the vent full-time because it adds a considerable amount of stuff we have to lug around and also adds a lot of time to our preparation of getting in and out the house to go to appointments – so I suppose this was my first re-understanding of how far we’ve come and how much I need to remember to be thankful for all that we do have. Thankfully, she seems to be feeling a lot better but is just having some trouble getting back off the ventilator.
I’ve also
realized that although I can’t do all the things that I want to do with my boys
they are surrounded by people who love and care for them. We’ve been very fortunate that throughout all
the ups and downs both of them seem well-adjusted and we’ve never had to leave
them in less than capable hands.
I
understand, too, that we are very fortunate to have respite….and not just any
person coming in to give us a break, but someone we’ve come to consider almost
part of our family. I completely trust
her with Zeta’s care – even when she is sick.
Zeta’s nurse spent the day with her Friday while Steve and I were able
to enjoy a fun day out with the boys……and yesterday we had a ‘date’ just the
two of us!
It’s like…….miraculously………somehow………since
we first found out Zeta would be a girl……..I grew up and finally started
figuring out a little about life…….up until that point I thought I understood a
little, but I really didn’t have a clue…………really, I know that I still don’t - but at least I realize it
and I’m ok with that……
Where your
treasure is, there your heart will be also. ~Matthew 6:21
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