Zeta Update - and Yeah, I'm from a small town!

I really cannot articulate the changes we have seen in Zeta since surgery. A lot of it would seem pretty subtle to someone not really familiar with Zeta, but to us they are huge changes. I think the biggest difference is that she seems to have more energy and we see a many more 'emerging' physical and cognitive skills.

When we were in Phoenix, someone asked me, "Are you prepared to handle all this? Are you prepared to take her home?" I'm not sure exactly what she meant when she asked me this....I know she didn't know the full details of Zeta's history...perhaps she thought the brain surgery was the first 'hiccup' we've had in her short life...I really don't know...what I do know is that when she asked, "Are you prepared for this?" I thought, "Am I prepared?" "YES, DEFINITELY, YES!" My baby acted better in the immediate days after surgery than I've ever seen her - EVER!!!! So, yes I'm prepared..... Will things continue to improve? I sure hope so..... Can I say for certain that everything will eventually be fixed? That's not up to me....But am I prepared? Yes....why?.....I have God to carry me through...even on days when I'm not sure if I'm even ready for my feet to hit the floor to start the day.

However, one thing that has changed drastically since surgery is her sleeping pattern. She has her days and nights mixed up! I just used to THINK I wasn't getting much sleep, but like I told Stevie yesterday - I would be happy to get more than 2-3 hours of sleep in a row right about now! I probably haven't really helped matters at all though......I mean sometimes when Zeta is up at night I'm just so thrilled with how happy she is that I HAVE to talk to her and play with her, so I KNOW that CONFUSES her even more! The past couple of nights have been a little better. She has slept about 6 hours in a row - granted she is not on the same schedule as ME though. She slept from 8pm till 2 am, while I was just getting to sleep around 1. Oh well, that's life and I'm happy for it! (Just don't ask me how I feel about it around 4 in the morning:) She has a couple of minor issues we are dealing with right now, but I'm thinking they may be tied to the change in her sleeping patterns.... Waiting for a call back from a doctor as I write now....

I also thought when we returned from Phoenix that our 'doctor visit' schedule on the calendar was finally letting up a bit, but we have quickly filled our weeks back up with appointments.......we've also rescheduled the surgery for her cleft repair (for the 3rd or 4th time)...I know I live off the adrenaline rush sometimes....if it were any different right now I don't know what I would do with myself. When we do get more than a few days at home I feel like I don't know what to do.

Now, sit back and let me tell you my 'little small town story'....and how I've kept my sanity thus far....

I live in Ulmer. For those of you who don't know Ulmer, I would caution you not to blink once you hit the 35mph sign.

When I was younger I dreamt of big city life and getting out of the country. I was moving away to college.....You know the deal - Live in a BIG city, get a BIG degree, make a BIG difference. FORTUNATELY, that never happened. The biggest city I moved to was Aiken, SC - and even that was too much city for me LOL! Now, I actually live in the house that I lived in until I was 8 years old.

I am very blessed to be surrounded by family. I am also blessed to be surrounded by long-time neighbors and friends. As I've grown older, I've come to realize how much it means to have friends and family close by, but since Zeta has been born those realizations have become even more concrete.

A couple of days after returning from Phoenix, we had to follow up with Zeta's pediatrican. Imagine, going down the road and seeing tangible reminders that friends and family have been praying for your family....this is exactly what I saw. Green and pink bows, representing Team Zeta, everywhere!

There is a lot to be said to be from a small town (actually a community of small towns - Allendale, Barnwell, Bamberg, Hampton). Like they say, 'everybody's famous in a small town'. I know that saying has a negative connotation most of the time....but in times of great need it is the ultimate comfort. Zeta has been blessed to be 'famous' in a small town. Blessed because so many people continuously pray. Blessed because we've had the opportunity to meet people we never would have known had we not been in these specific circumstances. Blessed because we are a part of God's greater plan.

I will not lie and say that everything is, or has been, all 'hunky dory'....or that any day is particularly easy.....BUT, as with anything else in life - we adapt. As humans we have the amazing gift of adaptibility.......and the way that we adapt depends largely in part to how much support we have. If we have support, we find hope, if we have hope things tend to be a bit easier.

If we lived in a big city we would be lost in a sea of people.....I am thankful for our small town, for our community and I am infinitely grateful for all that has been done for us!

With all of the support and prayers that we've experienced we are able to find hope when we are lacking. We are continually reminded of God's love for us, and we are eternally grateful for each and every one of you!